Blog hop

Welcome to my first blog hop, hosted by Young & Restless blogger, Christa!

A blog hop is a place to link up with other blogs to find new ones that you like.

Here are the rules: Grab this button and place it on your blog for the weekend.

<center><a href="http://christanncox.blogspot.com" target="_blank"><img alt="young and restless" src="http://i239.photobucket.com/albums/ff281/chrissyann336/Faerie_Wings.jpg" /></a></center>

Then, go visit Christa's blog, and be make sure to follow her!


Then, if you're a follower of my blog, link up down below. Happy reading!

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Teen Mom Recap: Farewell Special

Teen Mom is goin buh byes. I know so because Farrah told me that she was ready to be a big girl. She's been a big b#tch for four seasons now, so I'd say it's overdue. Right off the bat I'm wondering why Catelynn looks so haggard in her interview? She even looked like she had a black eye. Maybe Tyler decided to get his "Butch" on the night before this was filmed.

Amber's casting tape was a let down. She didn't punch anyone in the ear, or try to kick them down the stairs, or film it from inside a Cracker Barrel, or anything. What she did do is tell us that she ruined her mom's birthday by choosing that one night out of the whole year to tell her she was pregnant. How selfless of her. My favorite part of Amber's segments (And by Amber I mean Gary) is when they show Amber hitting Gary and they have to put "previously recorded" on the bottom of the screen so that no one calls the cops. I'm also on the same page as Gary when he says, "How did I survive?" because honestly, who knows?

Maci's mom somehow found out about the casting for 16 & Pregnant on Craigslist. I'd love to know what category she was browsing so that I can browse it daily. Going along with the normal pattern, Maci says in her casting tape that she has a "really good situation" going for herself and she has a partner who's there for her all the time. Cut to Ryan's interview and he says that he thought it felt just like any other relationship. In the end, much to our surprise, Maci is still working on her 2 year degree. Let's take bets on how many years total it will take Maci to get her associates degree. My guess is 15 years. I'm already pretty close.

P.S. I like Maci with her long red hair the best.

P.P.S. Did anyone else notice that weird chipmunk thing Ryan's dad did?

 Catelynn says in her casting tape that she is 15 years old and she has been dating Tyler for 2 years. People I would kill: people who say things like that. I have always hated it when people count the time when they were 12, and 13, and such , as actual years that they were "dating". I'm probably the one in the wrong, but I hate it. As usual my boyfriend Tyler brightens my day up when he tells us that he was so uncomfortable in front of the cameras that he would ask Catelynn what he should do. UGH, and again with the MTV using some sort of secret formula to get me emotionally invested in these people. It honestly makes me sad to hear Tyler say that he struggles with having to admit that Carly deserves better than him. Tyluh!! Don't be sad! Come to Idaho, I'll make you feel better. I'll even wear half pink, half yellow eye shadow if that's what you're into. (And it obviously is.)

 Later they recall how Butch and April disagreed entirely with their decision to put Carly up for adoption; which goes to show that April has to be one of the dumbest people I have ever seen on TV. (Besides Honey Boo Boo and her entire family-BLEH.) I will never understand people who know that they can't support a child, especially in the financial aspect, yet they still decide to keep their baby. I don't think there is any shame in letting equipped people care for your child, and as a matter of fact I commend anyone who is selfless enough to do it. But I digress. I don't know what Kim was thinking when she said "people think their lives are glamorous, but it's not like that at all."  I for one have never thought that living at  "the park" looked glamorous. What is glamorous is Kim's getup for this interview. Looking at everyone else, it's very obvious that there was no hair and make-up available for the interview taping--but Kim didn't let that stop her from looking fab.

"It's not cracked up to what's it's supposed to be."

Meanwhile Catelynn says that rather than glamorizing teen pregnancy, they're actually trying to stop the problem. I think if that's true then they should stop getting paid truckloads of money for filming this thing because if I would have know that I could make $280,000 a year at 18 just for getting knocked up I definitely would have done it. (Kidding.) When everyone is sitting around the table making birthday wishes for Carly, I can't help but notice that Nick is drinking a mini diet coke. In my opinion, great idea. Load your kid up on aspartame while his brain is still young and vulnerable.

Farrah says that when she found out she was pregnant, she had been pursuing acting up until then--which explains why she made it onto this softly scripted show. Farrah is inexplicably holding her Iphone during her entire casting tape, and it almost seemed as if she was using it as a reference for what to say.

The best part is in the pilot episode when one of Farrah's classmates asks if she is on the news. I seriously L-ed O L. What in god's name would Farrah be on the new for? (Besides having her mom get her "Butch" on..) I also love Farrah's desk neighbor asking, "Am I going to be on TV? You know, since I sit next to you and stuff?" (What is the "and stuff"?) Farrah also explains that she eventually realized that showing her story had a greater purpose, and that purpose was to prevent future teen pregnancies. Supposedly the the amount of teen pregnancies has dropped by 10% since the show aired, but I don't know if that's true or not. I just read it somewhere.

Later, while everyone (and I mean everyone) is talking about Amber as if she is dead ("She would have wanted this.."), Farrah cries (without the cry face) about how people are kicking them when they're down. I assume that she is talking about all of the people who make fun of them, which includes all of us Teen Mom bloggers; but I like to pretend that she is specifically referring to me. I don't want to make fun of the scene where Farrah asks Sophia to talk to her dad while at the cemetery, but I imagine that it's pretty hard to say "I love you" with a paci in your mouth. Sorry, sorry. Enough of that. Anywho, then Debra tells us how well the "abstinence" policy works, which I found pretty humorous. Not as humorous as Michael saying "birf control" the same way Amber says "birfday", but still funny. I don't even know what to say about Farrah's "ungry" friend. It was difficult to even understand him.

The end.

P.S. If MTV doesn't do a special on Catelynn and Tyler's wedding I will kill myself.

P.P.S. I am literally dying in anticipation of the "Amber behind bars" special.

P.P.P.S. Freaking become a member and follow my blog NOW

Photos by: Mtv

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Christy's butt won't fit on this

I've been seriously neglecting my blog lately. Here's a photo dump of all the reasons why.

Braeden had his first day at his new preschool. It was also the first time I've ever dropped him off to daycare/preschool. Everyone was preparing me for the drama that evidently comes along with dropping your kid off. When we got there he walked off before I could even sign him in. He couldn't have cared less. It was way sadder for me than it was for him. 

We also got two kittens. Although, they're pretty big for being only a few months old. Blake always had cats growing up and he loves them. He has been begging me to get one for years. When I was 12, a cat attacked me and scratched my entire face and I had to go to school the next day with band-aids all over my head. I have never been very fond of cats. One time back when Blake was a car salesman, they found a litter of kittens living in the engine of one of the Honda Civics. They rescued them, and Blake brought one home. Naturally, her name was Civie.

Unfortunately for Blake I was so annoyed with this cat by the time he got home from work, I told him he had to give it to one of the other car salesmen. I know, I know, I'm a terrible person. Civie now lives with a nice old lady and her other cats. 

That was about 2 years ago, and since then cats have kind of grown on me. I also feel like my kids are old enough to not kill them on accident, so I surprised Blake with a kitten when he came home from work one day. My sister's friend's cat had kittens, and I took one of them for her. The next morning, I went and got the other one because we figured they would want to stick together. Wrong. I think that in the 24 hours they were separated they forgot about each other because when I brought the other one home they both kept hissing at each other like they had no idea they were brothers. Of course, after a few days they went back to being BFFs. 

They were annoying for the first few days because all they did was sleep all day and then meow all the live long night. I think they missed their mom, but they're fine now.

 The all black one's name is Ponyo, and the black/white one's name is Garrus. If any of your husbands play Mass Effect they will know who Garrus is. I wanted to name Ponyo Voldemort, but Blake vetoed it. I'm glad he did now because that would have been embarrassing to say when the vet asked me his name.

I told Braeden to be careful petting them because they're babies and he told me, "They're not babies, they're kitties."

They love to cuddle.

Last weekend I was "Fundraiser Barbie".

 I went to a "Step Up for Downs Syndrome" walk in support of that adorable little girl right there. Is that not the cutest baby and the cutest outfit you have ever seen?

That evening we went to a "Concert for Cancer" which was thrown for my best friend and her husband, who was diagnosed with lymphoma--but recently came back with a clear PET scan--Woohoo!!!

The headliner band--Archer--on stage.

Then Tia got sick, and proceeded to get all of us sick. Blake and my diets pretty much consisted of Dayquil and Nyquil for 3 days. It was awesome.

Yesterday my dad came over and set up a swing set in our back yard for the kids. As usual, my niece Kelsey was filled with plenty of entertaining things to say.

As my dad was putting it together she asked him if the swing set was for her and Braeden. He answered, "Yes it's for everyone. You, Braeden, Tia, Aunt Christy..." 

To which Kelsey replied, "Aunt Christy's butt won't fit in this swing."

Thanks for the self esteem boost Kels.

We are pretty sure Kelsey has it out for me because she loves her Uncle Blake so much. She dramatically recalled to my sister, "MOM. I saw Uncle Blake kiss Christy and I DO NOT want to see it again. It was GROSS. I don't ever want to see it again, actually." 

What a lovely child. 

Oh, oh, and I also started school a few weeks ago-- to be a health unit coordinator. So if anyone wants to know some medical terminology, I'm your girl. 

I'll try to be less of a loser and update more frequently from now on. Teen Mom tomorrow night!! Some sort of "saying goodbye" episode or something, so come back on Wednesday for a recap!

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I think he's an extra small child

There's a restaurant up here in the Northwest called Flamin' Joe's, and they specialize in hot wings. They have a hot wing challenge where you have to eat a dozen wings covered in their "code red" sauce in under 4 minutes, and then you have to sit there without drinking anything for 4 minutes after you're done. Ever since I've had my daughter I can't eat spicy food whatsoever. Like seriously, not even pepperoni. So I wouldn't know, but supposedly the sauce is unbearable. I would never taste it because I honestly think I would actually die. I think I remember someone telling me once that when they wash out the pans that they make the sauce in, they have to open all the doors and everyone has to wear doctors masks. I might be making that up, I don't know. But seriously, I'm pretty sure I heard that.

Blake has been talking and talking and talking about doing it for months and months and months. Last Sunday he finally decided to try and do it. Before hand we were all sitting at the table contemplating all the ways that he could fail. I was telling him that he was probably going to throw up all over the table, but what I was really thinking was that there was no way he could eat 12 wings in 4 minutes. (20 seconds per wing.) I knew he could handle eating them, but I was sure he would probably fail from not doing it in time. I was way wrong--he ended up doing with the second shortest time ever.

He wasn't aware of the record until after he was done, so he was just trying to eat them in under 4 minutes. If you knew Blake you would know that he cannot come in anything other than first place ever. He is like a Tiger cub even though he didn't have a Tiger mom.

Here is the video--my favorite part is his friend's comments throughout the whole thing. "Does it taste good?!"

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Teen Mom Recap: Unseen Moments

Maci

Maci's first clip is very Maci-like. And by Maci-like, I mean painfully boring. In an effort to potty train Bentley, they tell him to go outside and pee on a tree. I've heard of people doing this, but not people that live in a neighborhood where anyone could easily drive by. Plus, taking him out in public isn't the best strategy to alleviate stage fright. (But what do I know-- because he peed.) I love how Maci seems to be eternally oblivious to everything. Like when she invited herself on Ryan's family's vacation. Or like her entire segment on the reunion where she pretended that Ryan still loved her. Or how she seems committed to the delusion that Kyle wants to not only get married to her, but also have kids with her. Later, Ryan and his family rehash what happened when Ryan went to go pick Bentley up from Pump It Up. Dalis is so upset that she starts crying, and I'm sure Maci did not take great pleasure in watching that at all. Kidding. She probably rewound it a dozen times with a big smile on her face just like the girl who eats the frosting out of the container at the beginning of Death Becomes Her. I really want to be that frosting eating cat lady one day. Except I will watch and re-watch the scene where Janelle and Keefuh get in a fight outside Plant Fun and Janelle throws her friend's boyfriend's change jar. Or the scene where Barb yells, "I got this b#tch of a daughta--you!!" at Janelle. Only because I love how Barb felt the need to clarify who exactly she was referring to.

Farrah

Apparently Sophia decided to redecorate her room a little bit, and the obvious solution to that is to have a gate installed to keep Sophia trapped in her room.

At first I was wondering how Farrah could be stupid enough to need someone to come to her apartment and baby-proof for her, but then I notice that she's too incompetent to even open or close the baby gate, so it's probably a good thing that she hired this guy. I was unaware that you could hire someone to provide this service. Where I come from, we do it ourselves. And by do it ourselves I mean have our husbands to it themselves. Speaking of husbands, it is a little awkward to watch Farrah talk to her neighbor about how Daniel might be the one, considering the fact that we know the ending to this story. Although it's nowhere near as awkward as watching Farrah kiss and snuggle and flirt with Daniel. I want the old, mean Farrah back. This nice Farrah creeps me out.

Farrah's "tattoo" scene seemed really fake, and really staged. I did find it funny though because right after the original episode that this clip is from aired, a Teen Mom blog posted a screen shot of her tattoo, talked about how she must have recently had it done, and said that it was "really cute". So I hope that after watching this they know that they are even stupider than Debra. And I hope they feel stupid for saying that a topless mermaid tattoo was "cute".

Catelynn

A picture of our responsible little Catelynn has recently surfaced, in which she appears to be smoking out of a bong. This makes watching her segments so much more fun now that I know she is secretly a fan of the mary-jane. Someone should warn Catelynn that marijuana is a gateway drug; which means she is slowly strolling down the path that leads to being Butch. I'm sure she had a fun time explaining this to Brandon and Theresa. Speaking of being on the path towards things--Tyler's mom looks like she is well on her way to looking just like that lady who tanned herself to a crisp.

Kim gives Catelynn some top of the line advice while driving to the place where weight is lost. (It's a lot like the place where adoptions happen, except not like it at all.) Kim's gem of knowledge goes something like, "Your self esteem will not be good if you're not feeling good about yourself." Brilliant. I guess that is better than what we all know she really wanted to say which was, "Your self esteem isn't going to be good if you're fat." Also brilliant. Catelynn tells the weight loss lady that she knows it is time to do something in an effort to lose the baby weight. *Cough* That she has had for 3 years *Cough* I've got some top of the line advice for Catelynn: Stop eating pizza for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There. Problem solved. Well, problem solved until the weight loss lady tells Catelynn that she can continue to eat everything that she enjoys and still lose weight. Which is true, if everything you enjoy eating is broccoli. Meanwhile Tyler goes and talks to his mom about possibly joining bank accounts with Catelynn. He is worried because evidently Catelynn isn't as good with money as he is, and he doesn't know if he can trust her. Tyler has got to be one of the smartest people in the whole trailer park. Probably the smartest, to be exact. While I was watching this part, Blake suggested that we do the opposite and separate our bank accounts. Which is genius, I think. I've always wanted to have one account with all of the money in it, and another account with no money in it. Except of course for the truck loads of cash I generate from this very lucrative blog. (HA.) Anyways, Catelynn really shows off her credibility at yet another diner when she talks about how she for sure is going to go to school to be a teacher. For sure. I for sure love how Tyler is explaining the list of all the things she has said she wants to do be, and his list includes: SWAT person, and canine. Lovely. But not as lovely as when Tyler says that he doesn't have a lot of patience so that's why he chose to go into counseling. Makes sense to me totes magotes.

Ambuh

And by Ambuh, I mostly mean Gary. First off I'd like to give a shout out to Gary's interior decorator. I hear the mix and match wallpaper motif is very "in" this year. And let's face it, wood paneling will always be "in". It's timeless, really.

 I don't really know what the first "unseen moment" of Amber's was supposed to show us. All I got out of it was that Leah slammed her hand inside her play kitchen's oven, and she was screaming as if she had slammed her hand inside a real oven. (And is that a Christmas themed wallpaper border I see? Lovely.)

 I also noticed Gary's "Mr" shirt, which hopefully means that Amber is wearing her "Mrs" one in rehab that day.

 Amber finally admits that she is an addict during a session with  one of her counselors. Sadly, not Rico Suave. I wish she would have admitted it sooner so we might have had a shot at seeing her on Intervention . She would probably be one of those people that walk right into the room, take one look at their family, and turn around and run away. I doubt Amber can run very fast or very far, so she probably would have ended up in rehab anyways. Which she definitely needed because for cripes sake, she is so obviously high as a kite in her last clip while she is doing Leah's hair. It sounds as if the the whole audio is in slow motion. "You arrre prettty babbbbbby..." "Puckerrr uppp.." Ugh! Gross.

She doesn't even open her eyes the entire clip! Which explains Leah's hair. ("High. HIGH. Ya both high!")


I hear that Maci and/or Farrah might be getting their own show(s). If this is true, I will definitely be recapping it, and I am looking forward to recapping Teen Mom 2. Janelle, Keefuh, and Barb are my favorite people ever, although I predict that Kailyn will be the new "Maci" because nothing ever happens with her. Unless of course she decides to take things "too far" in the shower with Jo again.

Photos by: Mtv

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Pump It Up

I feel like every one of my posts has to start out with, "Sorry I haven't written in a long time." So from now on, let's just make that our little unspoken agreement.

But seriously, for the last few weeks every time I see that "New Post" button I think, "BLEH. No. Not right now." I just haven't had it in me. Thankfully Teen Mom was able to get me back in the game.

Also I have been really busy lately. Not busy as in, busy for a normal person. More like busy for a stay at home mom. Which basically means I had a couple of things to do here and there. We are usually doing the same simple routine, day in and day out, so any time there is a little bit of commotion I feel like, "OH MY GOD I AM SO BUSY!!!"

In reality, all that happened was we got cats. I will have to do a post on it because there is a whole story. Basically, Blake loves cats and has been begging me to get one for years. I like animals, including cats, but I don't love having pets. I like cats, but I never thought I would want to live with one. I didn't like the idea of a litter box, and hair, and food/water dishes laying around for the kids to get into. Obviously I had a change of heart-- post to come.

Also today was my son's first day of daycare/pre-school. Well, it was his first day at his new daycare, and it was my first time ever dropping him off or picking him up or anything. Before he had only been to a daycare for a few hours here and there at the hospital where his grandmother works. Post to come on that too.

So, Teen Mom. I love how Dr. Drew always opens the show by saying, "Amber was not able to be here with us today." but he always leaves off the, "...because she's in gel." Instead we start out with Maci and as soon as I see her and her face I immediately feel bad for her. No amount of makeup could cover up what is happening to her skin. I happen to have extremely sensitive skin. Almost everything I come into contact with will make me break out. Fortunately for me, I'm not on TV. Unfortunately for Maci, she is. However, I'm sure a large part of the Teen Mom viewer population are girls in high school, therefore are probably in no place to be judging anyone's skin. They have their own problems to worry about. In fact, I'm so sure that the Teen Mom demographic is comprised of mostly teenagers that I constantly feel like I'm the only adult at a kids party. No. I feel like one of those people that inexplicably get a high school date so they can go to a high school prom, even though they graduated years ago. No. I feel like I'm riding on a carousel, and I look around to find that the rest of the horses are occupied by kids much younger than me. Causing me to think to myself, "Am I too old for this?!" the whole time.

Anyways, now that we're off that little tangent, let discuss how Kyle looks like he has aged approximately 15 years since the last time we saw him...which was less than a year ago. He is also way thinner. He wasn't cute before, but now he looks like the biggest creep ever. Also, I have figured out one of the reasons Kyle looks so weird. You literally cannot see the whites of his eyes. He has beady little black eyes like a hamster. Ew.



Did you notice his body language while sitting on that couch? Being the body language expert that I am, I can tell you that he basically hates Maci.

Same with Ryan and Dalis. I feel bad for her because her body language is never rejecting of any of them, so she basically has to sit there while a bunch of people who hate her sit down and have a "check up" with Dr. Drew. It makes me sad that Kyle said he was "over it" and that's why he didn't work harder to stay with Maci when she left. It makes me sad because I had no idea!They seemed to be getting along fine on the show. I was really embarrassed for Maci when she said that if she was not a teen mom, she and Ryan would still be together. I'm sure that if you asked Ryan that question his answer would be a little different. Then they bring Dalis on. She has her panties in a bunch for the whole segment, aside from when she dis-honestly compliments Maci and her parenting. Maybe she is mad because she didn't get any share of the money from the very subtle Pump It Up endorsement. She never even got to say Pump It Up during that episode. The only thing she said was "good". Speaking of which, I'm glad Dr. Drew called Maci out about birthday party-gate. Maci takes partial responsibility for what happened, but she also says that Bentley asked her to invite Ryan. Liar lair, pants on fire. Maci is lucky that Ryan is the laziest person we all have ever seen because he has been talking about getting their custody/schedule legalized for three seasons now, and has yet to do anything. As usual, he just sat there and looked like he wanted to strangle himself to death with his microphone cord the whole time.

This one is my favorite

Then Gary happened. Which is basically all there is to say about that. It happened. They read a letter from Amber, and Dr. Drew said that when he spoke to her she seemed to be a changed woman now that she is sober. (Yeah right.) I wonder if it was the same kind of "changed" facade that she put on while she was nearing the end of rehab. In her letter she says, "Leah is a little mini-me," and all of America collective thinks, "For the love of all that is holy, let's hope not."

At the end they bring all of the adults and the kids out, and as usual Sophia is looking at us like she is going to kill us in our sleep. (And yes, dear Jesus, she is still on the paci.)

They were going to put Gay and Leah on the same couch with Catelynn and Tyler, but there wasn't enough room so they had to get another one.

Do you think Ryan is ready to leave yet?

I am looking forward to the unseen moments episode. The reunion always bores me because it's just a bunch of information we already knew.

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Long Time No Talk

No. I'm sorry, I can't do it. I just can't. The first part of the Teen Mom reunion was so boring. Am I right?!  Half of it was old footage recapping what happened this season, but they didn't even show the best parts?! Like Sophia calling Farrah a bad person and Amber "dying" on top of her Conair hairbrush. Hello MTV, we don't need a look back at what happened this season. We have all watched each episode about a hundred times. As a matter of fact, I don't like cooking or cleaning in silence, so I often turn on my recorded Teen Mom reruns so that I have background noise to accompany me in whatever I'm doing. You know those movies that you have seen dozens of times, but whenever it comes on TV you can't help but watch it again? That's me with Teen Mom. And Bring it On. And The Social Network. Wow, this post just got really embarrassing.

In other news, it was my birthday on Monday, and I thought I would be all slick and make myself a cake that looked just like my blog button. This is how that worked out.

I thought it would be a good idea to use a leaf piping tip for the "She's weird" because I thought it would come out sort of italic looking. Shows how much I know about piping tips. If I would have continued using that tip I wouldn't have been able to fit "weird", so I went back to the regular one. Also, I used spray on food coloring, and I couldn't quite get it dark enough. However, I made the actual cake from scratch and it tasted delicious.

 To make me feel better about my terrible cake decorating skills, Blake brought me breakfast in bed on the morning of my birthday. And by breakfast I mean a mimosa in a princess glass.

Braeden sat on my lap while everyone sang Happy Birthday, and his version of the song goes something like, "Happy birthday mommmmy. Happy birthday mommmmmmmmy. Happy birthday mommmmmmy." Ugh, ohmygod, adorable.

In other other news, I'm pretty sure Tia thinks that the people she knows are the only people that exist. She climbed up on the couch yesterday, looked out into the front yard, and said "Dada, dada, dada, dada." It was about dinner time so I'm pretty sure she knew that it was time for him to come home, so she was waiting for him. Like when a dog knows that it's time for the kids to come home from school. Then whenever anyone would drive by she would call them mama, dada, mimi, or papa, and I was thinking-- Wait...do you not understand that there are other people? She didn't answer me of course, but I would be willing to bet that her answer was no.

Finally, if you haven't already noticed (and you probably haven't), I have a total of FOUR whole followers now. Count them---four. I know I just made that option available, but geez. I could count my number of followers on less than one hand. How depressing! I can't handle this on top of the disappointment of Teen Mom the other night!

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